I'm confused and lame and possibly a crappy person. Any advice would be helpful.

This is a very long story I'll try to keep as short as possible: last night, my boyfriend of five years and I broke up because I'm a lesbian, and he's a transman. I thought I could adapt and grow to love his body as much as I enjoy women's bodies, but it seems I couldn't. It wasn't fair for him to be in a relationship with someone who couldn't desire him like he deserves, so we broke up.

I have two days to leave the apartment we share. I have to move back in with my parents. They don't know I'm gay, since I've been dating this man for five years, and I've never told them about any of the girls I've dated. My ex said that if my parents talked to him, he would tell them that I dumped him because I'm gay. Tomorrow, I have to go to my parents and ask them if I can stay with them until my next payday, when I can afford to rent a room somewhere.

I really don't want to tell my parents. I think I must be a horrible internalized homophobe. They would probably be friendly and understanding; I just can't bear the thought of having a coming-out conversation with them, especially when it involves me telling them that I've broken up with the boy they considered a son. How do I tell them? How do I even begin this conversation? I was contemplating sleeping in my car for a week so that I don't have to go to my parent's house, but that would be stupid. I need to just do this, but I don't know how.

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